Alumni Services

I’m not sure how they do it but the college I (finally) graduated from always manages to track down my email address – even though it’s changed at least two times. I know for a fact I’ve never signed up for any newsletter, but there it is in my inbox nonetheless:

An invitation to some Alumni event that celebrates the day all my student loans came due I graduated.

No thank you, school.

My liver is not ready for round two of you.